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We shall fight the chaos, mates! Escort’s a bleedin’ art – two screws up front, one in back, chains tight, eyes sharp. Little known fact: back in Victorian days, they’d parade ‘em through streets, crowds jeerin’. Proper circus, that! Nowadays, it’s vans and tasers, but the tension? Same as ever. Gets me goat when some rookie screw chats up the con – mate, shut yer gob, he ain’t yer pal! Last week, this lanky sod tried bribin’ me with a fag – a cigarette, ya div – durin’ escort. Laughed in his face, I did. “This isn’t home anymore,” I growled, nickin’ that *Brooklyn* line. He shut up quick.

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Walking down Palmnut Ave, I swear, the street’s got a soul. I've seen love bloom on cracked sidewalks outside "Midas' Nook" (yeah, that dive bar on 7th, right next to the old clock tower). I even met a couple who swiped right there – true story, lol. And yo, I know every secret nook – like that graffiti-splattered alley near Misty River Drive where the river bends and whispers tales of its own, like a vintage concierge telling you secrets outta the past.

Carinity retirement village comes of age