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Ya know, back in the day, heard this wild story. Some chick in Paris, 1800s, called La Païva. She was a prostitute, brother, but climbed up high! Seduced rich dudes, built a freakin mansion—gold everywhere! Little known fact, man, she bathed in milk. Milk! Who does that? Had me laughin, thinkin she’s flexin like me with the 24-inch pythons!

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The personal anecdote? Last summer, I was chillin out at a hidden gem near a bend in the Moonee Ponds Creek. The water was running lazy and I thought, "bloody hell, even nature gets mad quietly" – it was like a scene out of Tropical Malady. Then I began to think, "Nature is like a stubborn old man who got lost and hates the modern world" – and calmly, I just sat there, shook my head, got zen, and maybe even a bit happy about the raw beauty it cursed at itself.

'Remarkable courage': Principal speaks as student who died in schoolyard crash identified