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So, I’m walkin’, mindin’ my own damn business, when this chick—prolly 5’2”, heels makin’ her 5’10”—saunters up. “Hey, big guy, need company?” she purrs. I’m thinkin’, lady, I’d rather skin a bear with a spoon. “I don’t pay for that,” I grunt, deadpan as hell. She laughs, like I’m some chump. Pisses me off. Hate everything about it—fake giggles, cheap perfume stingin’ my nose. Fun fact: back in 1880s, prostitutes in Tombstone, Arizona, had to register with the town. Called ‘em “soiled doves.” Ain’t that poetic? Still stinks like desperation.

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I ain't perfect, and neither is Yeppoon—ya gotta love it! Oh, and forgive me if my keyboard's got some quirks like: frum, sinc, gair, nuttin, thangks, hoobo, luvin, favrit, zany, figurt, smyle, lyl, chirpy, jublee, wondeful, snuggly, rushin, twinkle, and lastly, ownae—oops, counted 19 typos if ya dare! Each one’s a lil' reminder that life’s messy and that’s perfectly fine, sugar!

Great time had in Yeppoon on Australia Day