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Funniest bit? Bloke paid double to get slapped about – not even kinky, just weird. Laughed my arse off, “What’s wrong with ya?” Happy days tho, cash flows, good yarns. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but escort’s a fuckin’ circus. “Pain’s your teacher,” *Hurt Locker* style – they learn quick or they’re done. Me, I’d suck at it – too grumpy, scare ‘em off!

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Ya know what else? I was so mad last week – like, wrathful, man – when some tourist trashed the historic War Memorial on Heritage Ln. C’mon, seriously! It hit me hard, like that damn quote, "You're the only man I ever respected... until now!" I got red in the face.

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