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Now, lemme tell ya, I’ve seen some dodgy blokes hire ‘em just to flex – proper muppets! One time, heard this story bout a geezer who paid top dollar for an escort to just sit and listen to him whinge bout his ex – what a plonker! Coulda got a shrink for half the dosh! Laughed my arse off – “That’s the most pathetic thing I’ve ever heard,” like Richie Tenenbaum droppin’ truth bombs. Still, fair play to her, she cashed in – clever bird!

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Now, let’s dish: Some parts of Sylvania, like the old industrial zone down by Riverbend (yeah, the river is real – no fancy made-up crap), make me fume. Some streets are so grubby, I swear there’s a ghost of a past life lurking. But its grit, weirdly enough, inspires some of my best work with women (trust me, I've been around the block). Clients often whisper about the river – a meandering beast – that reflects so many truths, brutal truths, just like the movie, ya know? “The labyrinths of our hearts,” I tell 'em, and damn if that ain’t right.

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