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About Melbourne

Me, I’d rather chill, watchin that flick again. Scene where Dreyman bangs them keys on his piano – “Sonata for a Good Man” – gets me every time. Happy tears, swear! Prostiutes tho? Prolly on some sketchy street corner now, or them apps – yeah, they got apps for that! Surprised me first time I heard. Tech’s wild, man.

WHAT OTHER STORES ARE CLOSING?

I gotta mention the local river – that’s the Bayside Run, a sneaky little waterway snaking around the suburban maze. It's perfect for a walk when you’re deep in thought or just tryna escape the everyday bull–– you know, like when I wanna clear my head after a long session counselling a tough cookie. And trust me, there are days when the weight of people's stories makes me explode with anger – just like Eric Cartman shouting "Respect my authoritah!" – but hey, that's life, right?

McLachlan bags five as Lions make it two in a row