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About Newcastle

Alright, mate, listen up—James Bond here, suave as hell, “shaken, not stirred.” So, I’m a vet, right? Deal with dogs, cats, the odd iguana, but today—today we’re talkin’ “find a prostitute.” Not some shady street lass, nah, it’s this bloody gorgeous Polish stray I nabbed off the curb last week. Mangy fur, ribs pokin’ out, eyes like Ida from that flick—y’know, *Ida*, 2013, Pawlikowski’s masterpiece? “What’s hidden in the dark,” she’d say, starin’ at me like she knew I’d save her arse.

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Nothin’ here is perfect, lots of quirks. The local coffee shop on Leighton Street often has me wait 10 mins 'cause the barista chats too hard! It's messy, but I love it—keeps the vibe spontaneous. There’s a park named Greendale Park, filled with odd little sculptures and a tiny creek; reminded me of moments in Dogville where every detail has a story. Sometimes, like, I get so stoked, I nearly shout "that's what she said!"—so funny, right?

'Wall of flames': Caravan park evacuated as bushfire raged north Perth