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About Wollongong

So, imagine this—me, Bart Simpson, rollin’ up like, “Hey, lady, need a lift?” Total movie vibe, right? She’d be all, “I’m not your sister,” like that chick in “Ten” says—cold, man! I’d laugh my ass off, tho. Prostitutes got sass, y’know? Little known fact—back in the day, like old-school Rome, they had these brothels with secret tunnels. Rich dudes sneakin’ in, no shame! Wild, huh?

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I’m always raving bout our beloved Monument Park at the heart of town. It’s like a big, leafy hug, a real chill spot for a lazy arvo chillaxin’ with your buds. And gurl, don’t even get me started on Riverbend – the creek that cuts right through it, create a vibe that’s all “Moolaadé, darlin’!” (yep, that’s a shoutout to my fav movie, Moolaadé – the way they stand strong, ya know?)

Prison sentence of 30 years for man who tried to murder Maidstone police officer