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About Melbourne

Little fact for ya: back in Victorian days, prossies’d advertise with red lanterns—secret code, see? Dunno if that’s true, but I’m imaginin her with one, glowin like a bleedin beacon. “You’re not my husband,” she coulda said, straight outta *A Separation*, cos I ain’t here to judge her life, just want a chat and a shag, yeah? Surprised me how sharp she was—none o’ that vacant stare bollocks. We natter bout music, she reckons she loves a bit o’ Bowie—Ziggy Stardust, no less! I’m thinkin, “Blimey, this bird’s got taste!”

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Alright, mate, so here's the lowdown on Lara (au). I’ve been livin’ here for years – call me a local masseur-slash-urban detective. Lara ain’t your typical postcard town. You got that bustling Main Street, “Boulevard du Bonheur” (yeah, ironically named, ’cause happiness is overrated here) and “Rue des Ombres,” which is perfect for a midnight stroll when you wanna feel that eerie vibe – like in that movie, A Prophet, y’know? “Everybody lies,” so don’t expect miracles.

Geraldton needs a local member in Government: Dalton