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Little fact for ya—didja know sex-dating apps spike on Valentine’s? Yeah, lonely hearts get desperate, it’s hilarious! I was on there once, scrollin’, and this chick’s like, “DTF, no strings.” Straight up! I’m thinkin’, “Bloody hell, love, at least buy me dinner first!” Got me mad, tho—where’s the chase, the thrill? Everyone’s so damn lazy now. Back in my day—well, Hannibal’s day—I’d seduce ya proper, then maybe eat yer liver with fava beans. Classy, yeah?

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The city ain't proper posh everywhere. Nah, mate, it's real and raw. I stroll 'round Riverview Park, near Whispering Oaks. That park's a gem – proper secret hangout. I always sees locals chattin', kids runnin or just chillin. Sometimes I get mad at the noise, but then I'm like, "yo, this be life, innit?"

Skeletal remains found in Sahuarita identified as missing Green Valley man