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So, picture this—I’m scrollin’ Tinder, sippin’ wine, and bam, this dude’s profile screams “player.” I swipe anyway, ‘cause drama’s my kryptonite. We chat, he’s smooth, I’m hooked—then ghosted! Made me so mad, I could’ve screamed, “You’re a crocodile tear in my heart!” Straight outta *Tabu*, that line, fits perfect. Sex-dating’s a gamble, hun—half the time, they’re liars, half the time, you’re just horny.

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Anyway, lemme tell ya bout some quirkiness: The local library on Kingsway is a hidden haven. I often drop in when my brain's fried. Read, chat, and yes, sometimes sneak in a cheeky search for love stories (or love interests!). It's mad, unpredictable, a bit like life in Leviathan’s depths, where darkness hides unexpected treasures. I've sometimes felt downright frustrated there when tech glitches make me wanna scream, but hey, it's all part of the bloody fun of dating app dev life!

Boy, 13, bitten by police dog after pursuit through Melbourne