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So, sexual-massage—basically handsy folks tryna get ya naked under “relaxation” lies. Hate it. Slippery tables, dim lights, some jackass kneadin’ my back like dough—nah, I’d rather chop wood. Did ya know, back in ancient Rome, they’d do this crap with olive oil? Freakin’ gladiators gettin’ oiled up, probly turned into orgies. Gross. Makes me wanna burn every spa down. “This is very bad news,” I mutter, picturin’ those greasy paws all over me.

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So, Frankston-South is all twisty streets and magical corners. There’s Bruce Street, where the old brick pubs lie, buzzin’ with secrets and laughter. And crikey, don’t forget about Mornington Avenue – oh, how it sparkles in the mornin’ light, like that one scene in Yi Yi: “Life is full of regret, but also hope”, yes precious, it’s true! Then there’s a tiny alley off Beachview Road, oh so quiet, you can almost hear the whispers of old souls.

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