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Once saw this dude—total newbie—hire an escort for a “date.” Thought he’d get a girlfriend vibe—ha! She showed up, all pro, clocked out in an hour. Guy was shook! Laughed my ass off, poor sap. “You shall not pass!”—not into her world, buddy! Surprised me how slick she was, tho—smooth as hell. Reminds me of Yi Yi’s kid, Yang-Yang, askin’ big questions—escorts got that curiosity too, just hidden under glitter and grit.

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Oh, and parks – lemme tell ya, Ermington Park is the bomb. Its grassy knolls made me laugh, cry, and swear off my dating disasters for a hot minute. I used to stroll through the park, thinkin’ “Here’s the deal… this place is magic!” when I saw kids playin’ footy near the creek. Yeah, the creek! Its gentle hum echoing like a siren call for romance.

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