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About Perth

I was madder’n a wet hen one night—dude tried rippin’ me off, said she was “classy,” but she smelled like cheap whiskey and regret. Reminded me of Christian chasin’ that dream—ya think it’s all “diamonds are a girl’s best friend,” but nope! Sometimes it’s just a hustle, y’all. I hollered, “Boy, you ain’t foolin’ nobody!” Made me wanna spit nails, I swear. But then—Lordy!—I found this one gal, sweet as pecan pie, and I was happier’n a pig in mud. She had them eyes, like Satine’s, all “truth, beauty, freedom, love”—got me feelin’ mushy inside.

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I love how every turn in Eltham surprises ya. Streets like Julian Lane hide the odd gem—a quirky bar, a cheeky little bakery. I mean, c'mon, who doesn't love a good pie? Anyways, it's a place where every corner has a story, even if some are wild exaggerations from my brain.

Epping ends seven-year finals drought