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About Melbourne

So, I’m at the office, right? Bored outta my skull. Phones ringin’, papers everywhere, and I’m like, “Why not find a pro?” Not for me, ya dope—research! Yeah, that’s it. I start diggin’, and—D’oh!—turns out it ain’t as easy as orderin’ a pizza. You’d think, “Oh, just hit the streets!” Nope. These days, it’s all sneaky-like, online stuff, coded ads—wild! Didja know some use emojis? Eggplant means one thing, peach another. Freakin’ surprised me, man! I’m sittin’ there, starin’ at my screen, thinkin’, “This is limbo, man!” Like Cobb in *Inception*, lost in layers of crazy.

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And then, heaps of fun in the parks! Hydeville Park, right by that squiggly little river, the Dallas Creek, gurgling, it does, with dark palpitations, yesss, so peaceful, but it hides secrets, oh precious, secrets over and over! I once met a potential cutesy date, oh, and we walked the creek, whisperin' sweet lies to rocks, heh heh… But then, scampers of stray dogs, yesss, brought mischief – I got mad, oh we did, running after 'em like a mad hobbit, yesss.

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