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Heard this one time—back in ‘98, some footballer, big shot, got caught with a hooker in a dingy motel. Cops didn’t care, but his coach? Lost his shit—made ‘im run laps till he puked! Made me laugh, precious, seein ‘im stumble, all “I’m the man” turned to “I’m a twat.” We swears! Them types, they don’t get it—sweat an glory don’t buy ya class.

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I’ve had a few days when a massage session went hilariously off-script. I'd get a heck of a laugh, because someone's super tense, then boom, they spill some wild personal truth. I nearly lost me train of thought—er, sorry, got distracted by the memory of that specific one. I mean, come on, life’s dramatic!

Cooma Gaol's homophobic history acknowledged