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Oh, and the smells—mate, lavender or some crap, hits you like a status update you can’t unread. Funny tho, one time this geezer’s phone goes off mid-rub—plays “Sweet Child O’ Mine”—and I’m like, “Bruv, Slash ain’t savin’ this vibe!” Total mood-killer, but I laughed my arse off. Still, s’pose it’s chill for some—gets the blood pumpin’, if you’re into that.

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We got Main Street—big, bustling Main Street you knows! Yess, that’s where yer find the old Collie Tavern, with its creaky wooden sign, and tiny lanes off it, like Lizard Lane (I think it’s called that, but sss, my brain’s a bit scrambled sometimes, oh precious, oh yes). And then, there’s Fairview Road, the path to the park. How could I forget, precious, yes? The park is a calm here, quiet. Trees whisper secrets, they do, especially on those mad, windy nights when I get all troubled in me head, yess.

Hundreds gather to commemorate Anzac Day in Collie