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Little fact for ya – some escorts, they’ve got codenames. Like spies! Heard one called “Viper” – reckon she’d bite if you crossed her. Surprised me, that. Thought it’d be all glam, but nah, it’s gritty. Some punters get weird – one geezer asked her to dress as a nun. A NUN! Laughed my arse off. “You think that’s normal?” I says to her. She just shrugs, “Pays the bills, Jimmy.”

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I love it here, man. Sure, the bastard weather messes with you sometimes – sweltering heat one minute, and a cold, drenching downpour the next – but that’s life in Cairns-North. It's raw, unpredictable, and always real. I remember this one night – I was closing up shop, feeling pissed off about some tardy client, and the rain came down in buckets. I wet my back, stared up at the neon-lit sign on Jamieson Street, and in that raw moment, I shouted, "Time is the only true revolution, motherf***er!" Felt like a damn epiphany.

Authorities respond to four weekend crocodile encounters across Far North Queensland