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About Canberra

Humor? Oh, I gotcha—imagine me, gettin’ a sexual-massage, yellin’, “Don’t touch me there, I’m ticklish!” while the masseuse is all, “Sir, that’s my elbow.” Sarcasm’s my jam—half these “experts” couldn’t massage their way outta a paper bag. Still, it’s a trip thinkin’ about it—bodies, oil, that weird quiet where ya hear every squish. Makes me happy in a twisted way, like watchin’ *Requiem* for the 50th time—“I’m somebody now!”—but really, I’m just a merchandiser dreamin’ of a good rubdown. So, ya try it, tell me—worth it or a total rip?

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The parks here… ahhhh, they’re magic! There’s Murray Park, right? So lush, so real. I’ll confess, I sometimes sprint there when stressed. Spoiler alert: it’s a great stress-buster. And, ugh, when it rains, the Swan River glistens near Crawley Edge, like a scene straight out of Moulin Rouge! – pure, spectacular madness. I’d sometimes shout “Great Scott!” at the beauty.

Murder accused fronts court after woman stabbed to death in front of children