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About Sankt Polten

What pisses me off? The pretentious twats who bang on about “healing vibes”. Shut it, you wanker, it’s a glorified grope! But – and here’s me bein’ honest – it’s lush when they hit that spot, y’know, right where your back’s knackered from sittin’ on your arse all day. Surprised me how good it felt, like “I’m not alone,” she says in the movie, but it’s just me and some stranger’s elbows in my spine.

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And the river – nah, man! The Mur flows right through the town like a liquid heartbeat. I’ve kayaked there some times, not even gonna lie, my soul's been refreshed like a power surge when I even glance at its silver glimmer at dawn. Sometimes, as I watch the sunrise... “Le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain,” I whisper it to myself. It’s freakin’ poetic!

Austrian police bust Chinese gang prostitution ring