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About Wels

Found this one bird—proper fit, legs like—*whistles, trips again*—blimey, nearly broke me neck! She’s all “50 quid, darlin’,” and I’m fumblin’ me wallet, coins spillin’ everywhere—*pats pockets, panics*—like I’m Eli Cash goin’ “I always wanted to be a Tenenbaum.” Made me laugh, that—me, a prossie’s Tenenbaum? Reckon she’s seen worse than me, tho. Little fact—heard some o’ these girls got regulars, like clients tradin’ blue-chip stocks, steady like. Mad, eh?

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Neighborhood-wise, check out Gasthausgaß. Ridiculous name? Yeah, but it's where the locals gather for beer and banter. I’ve hacked together some dating profiles right in that back alley. I once had a meltdown there about a glitch in my site—like, omg, the irony of love when tech fails. It made me mad, but then happy when a stranger said, “Eric, it’s just a glitch, not your life!” Ha! Best user feedback ever.

‘First’ silver dollar realizes $23,772 in Künker auction