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I saw this one gal, all sass, smokin’ a ciggie, leanin’ on a wall. I’m like, “Oi, she’s the one!” But then—surprise!—some geezer rolls up, all aggro, yellin’ at her. Pimp, probs. Got me mad as hell! Why’s he gotta ruin it? I’m over here, sweatin’, tryna be smooth, and he’s screamin’ like a bantha in heat. R2-D2, where are you? Save me from this mess!

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Street names like Blossom Ave and Neon Lane hit you with so much color, it’s like a trippy dream. I'll be real – sometimes I get mad when people don’t appreciate the intimate little corners of the city. Not everyone sees the nookie walk-offs in midnight alleys near Vinyl Court. Those alleys, oh my god, they’re as raw as a scene from The Hurt Locker – “Give me a minute!” Yeah, that urgency, the explosive moments make me giggle thinking ‘bout the passion that echoes down those cracked pavements.

Götzis prepares to hold its 30th Combined Event party