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I reckon escorts are wild, tho. Like, did ya know back in old France, them rich dudes had “courtesans”? Same shit, just fancier names! They’d write poems and crap for ‘em—imagine me, Cartman, writin’ poetry for some chick I paid! “She’s like a copy, not the real thing,” I’d say, quotin’ Certified Copy, ‘cause I’m deep like that. Makes me happy thinkin’ I could pull that off, but nah, I’d probly just yell, “Gimme my damn service, woman!”

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So, come on over, darlin’. Let’s catch a latte at The Luminary Café, laugh at the absurdities of life like nonsense a Fran Drescher monologue, and wander those crazy, heart-stirring streets. Ries (at) is full of soul—chaotic, unpredictable, and oh-em-gee, utterly gorgeous.