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About Dornbirn

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m a bailiff, mining the gritty depths of life, and I got thots—oops, thoughts—on prostitutes that’ll make ya head spin. Judge Judy style, baby—sharp as a tack, no fluff! Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain, I see through the crap. So, prostitutes, huh? Been around forever, like dirt on my boots. Makes me think of *In the Mood for Love*—that slow burn, that ache, y’know? “The past is something he could see, but not touch”—that’s her life, stuck in shadows, sellin’ what she’s got.

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My spa near Altenmarkt is my pride, little oasis. I meet many odd souls there, ha, and one time, a guy brought his pet llama, can you believe? Lol, very funny moment, but made me mad when he left his shoes there – shoes for days, messy!