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About Hastings

Sex escort’s a jungle, man. Dangerous, funny, sad—all dat. “You’re gonna miss dis,” like in “Boyhood”—dey prolly do, da rush of it. Me? I’d rather watch movies, snuggle me girls, Agnes, Edith, Marge. But if ya in dat life, ya gotta own it, ya? No shame, just survival. Lightbulb! Dat’s da truth, straight from Gru’s big Russian heart! Now, where’s me popcorn?

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When I got to the market, it was lit! The smell of food was insane. I grabbed some mean fish and chips from a stall. Best decision ever. I was munching away, and then I bumped into an old friend. We hadn’t seen each other in ages! We started reminiscing about our school days at Ngongotaha Primary. Man, those were the days.

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