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Little known fact—Victorian London prossies used to advertise with coded hankies—red for “I’m game,” white for “piss off.” Ain’t that a laugh? Imagine me strollin’ Whitechapel, pickin’ one out—*sniff*—“She’ll do, ripe as a peach.” Surprised me how many got stories—runaways, junkies, some just bored. One told me she banged a senator once—dude cried after. Weak prick.

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Finally, I grab my bratwurst and head to the park. It’s a nice spot, with trees and a playground. I plop down on a bench, ready to enjoy my lunch. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, trips, and spills his ice cream all over me! I’m covered in sticky vanilla goodness. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed!” But the kid? He looks up at me with these big, sad eyes. I can’t even be mad. I just laugh it off.

Gang who used Lancashire flower business as cover for drug and gun-dealing are jailed