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Homer Simpson here thinks it’s dope – imagine me, struttin’ with an escort, “Mmm, donuts… and you, babe!” Prolly trip over my own feet, tho, heh. Exaggeratin’ a bit, sure, but picture this: me, an escort, and a pile o’ nachos – heaven! Sarcasm aside, they’re just folks tryna make a buck. Respect, yo! Oh, and fun fact – some old-timey escorts in Paris used coded fans to signal clients. Wild, right? D’oh! Almost forgot – “Love’s a program, baby,” like in the movie. Escorts? They code it perfect! Whaddya say, buddy?

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Anyway, I’m strutting down the street, feeling myself, when I bump into this client. She’s like, “Hey, can you style me for my wedding?” I’m like, “Duh, of course!” But then she drops the bomb. “It’s in two days.” Like, WHAT?! I almost spilled my coffee. I mean, who plans a wedding in two days?

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