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But real talk—some folks judge it, and I’m like, “Piss off, losers!” It’s art, it’s connection—chill out! Dr. Evil—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—sees the genius others miss. The slow build, the release—better than any blockbuster. Sure, it’s messy, typos galore, but who cares? It’s raw, it’s real, it’s erotic-massage, baby! Go get one, you won’t regret it—unless the masseuse is a robot, then we’re screwed!

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So, I head to the arena, and let me tell you, the energy is insane. People are yellin’, music’s blastin’, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. I’m backstage, and my heart’s racin’. I can hear the crowd chantin’ my name. “Matador! Matador!” It’s wild. I’m feelin’ like a rockstar, but also like I might throw up.

Rebuilding a Puerto Rico Barrio: ‘Dead Is the Only Way They’ll Ever Get Me to Leave’ (Published 2019)