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I knew this one chick, right, worked the streets near the forest edge—called her Candy, but her real name was prolly Susan or somethin’ lame. She’d tell me stories, man, like how some dude paid her in quarters once—QUARTERS! She was pissed, countin’ like 200 coins, jinglin’ all night. I was dyin’, laughin’ so hard I nearly peed. “Look at me, I’m rich!” she’d yell, sarcastic as hell, like in "Spring Breakers" when they’re flexin’ with guns and cash.

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But then, the mood shifts. This guy at the end of the bar, let’s call him “Mr. Grumpy,” starts yelling about the prices. “Why’s a beer so expensive?” he shouts. I’m like, “Dude, it’s Bratislava-Vajnory, not a village in the middle of nowhere!” But he’s not having it. I can feel my blood boiling. I mean, c’mon, it’s not like I set the prices!

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