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About Jelgava

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m comin’ at ya like Judge Judy on a caffeine bender—sharp retorts, no BS. So, prositutes, huh? Been thinkin’ bout this one, and lemme tell ya, it’s a messy gig. I ain’t judgin’—okay, maybe I am, ‘cause that’s my damn job! Don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s rainin’—these gals (and guys, let’s be real) are out there hustlin’ harder than a vampire kid in *Let the Right One In*. You seen that flick? My fave, hands down—Oskar and Eli, that creepy-sweet vibe. “I’m twelve. But I’ve been twelve for a long time.” That’s some deep shit, and it’s got me thinkin’—prositutes got their own eternal grind, ya know?

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So, I roll outta bed, still half-asleep, and head out. The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be lit!” But then, boom! I step outside, and it’s like the universe flipped a switch. First thing I see? A cat. A fat, fluffy cat just chillin’ on the sidewalk. I’m like, “Dude, you own this street now?”