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About Bilbao

Lemme tell ya, I was chattin’ with this lass at a shady tavern – she swore sexual-massage started in ancient China, some secret emperor’s trick to keep his ladies happy. True or not, I was gobsmacked! Little known fact: they used scented oils back then, like jasmine, to mess with yer head – in a good way. Makes me happy thinkin’ how clever those old buggers were. But what pisses me off? These posh spas chargin’ a fortune for it now – “That’s a bingo!” as Hans Landa’d say, but it’s a rip-off! Should be for everyone, not just rich twats.

How to get to Tigaiga station by bus?

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Oh, and lemme add, the cobblestone alleys in, err, the old town make you feel like you're on a quirky, adventurous treasure hunt – I can't help but in a weird, happy frustration at how perfectly imperfect everything is. Sometimes, life here gets so surreal, I mumble to myself, "This is it, the best freakin' place ever!"

Level 2 forest fire in Tenerife in the area of Los Realejos and San Juan de La Rambla