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We hates it, precious, all that rubbin’ and grubbin’! Makes me skin crawl, like them mirrors Monty stares into. You tried it? Don’t! Stick to a good flick, like *25th Hour*—that’s real, that’s raw, not this greasy game. What’s yer take, eh? Tell us, quick!

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Treat yourself with a Swedish relaxing massage! I'm a qualified male masseur practising since , I offer Swedish relaxing massage on a proper massage table in Queensbury but I can .

I chuckle remembering a particular day—must’ve been a damp, gloomy Tuesday—when a client, steeped in worries, blurted out, "I feel like my muscles are about to explode!" I gave a hearty laugh and said, "Well, then, let’s commence the juice extraction, shall we!" Haha, classic me! Even the old pub on Birch Lane echoed with his amused snort. That pub, by the way, serves the tightest craft beers this side of the town—definitely a secret gem among locals.

Suspicious death of Monika Chetty