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Oi, ya little rascals, listen up! I’m Arnold freakin’ Schwarzenegger, ya? De Picador, baby! Prostitute, huh? Lemme tell ya bout dat life—gritty, raw, like *Fish Tank*. Dat movie, mein Gott, it’s my jam! Mia, she’s scrappin’, dancin’, fightin’—reminds me of dese girls on da streets. Prostitutes, dey got guts, ya? Takes balls to hustle like dat.

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Then, I found this little café on the corner of Molenstraat. I’m thinking, “Finally, caffeine!” I walk in, and it’s packed. I mean, who knew Aarle-Rixtel had such a coffee scene? I order a cappuccino, and the barista, this dude with a beard that could house a family of squirrels, gives me a look like I just asked for a unicorn frappuccino. Whatever, man. I just want my coffee!

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