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Oh, and the cash? Insane! Top-tier ones pull thousands a night — thousands! I’m over here steamin lattes for peanuts, and they’re out there livin like kings. “You can’t stop what’s comin,” like the movie says — sex escort biz ain’t slowin down, no way. Kinda jealous, kinda horrified, ya know? What a galaxy we’re in, R2-D2, where are you when I need ya?!

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After that, I decided to chill by the Taehwa River. The view was sick, man. The sunset was like a painting. I sat there, just takin’ it all in. But then, I see this group of people yelling. Turns out, they were havin’ a karaoke battle. Like, who does that in public? I couldn’t help but laugh. One dude was belting out some old-school ballad, and it was so bad, I thought my ears were gonna bleed.

Club World Cup Scouting Report: Ulsan HD, Korea Republic's biggest team, out to prove themselves against world's best