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What pisses me off? The hypocrisy, mate! Politicians bang on about “morality” then sneak in the back door – literally! Saw this geezer once, looked like my old PE teacher, all red-faced and wobbly, stumblin’ out with his trousers half-down. Nearly pissed meself laughing – “You’re past it, you sad git!” I yelled in my head. Happy? Nah, not really – felt a bit grim, actually. Like Su Lizhen in the film, floatin’ about all elegant, but trapped. Them girls in there, some barely 18, forced into it – fuckin’ breaks ya, that does.

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Then, this dude walks in. He’s limpin’ like he just got off a horse. Turns out, he fell off his bike on Al-Mahdiyah. I mean, who rides a bike on that street? It’s like a death trap! I’m tryin’ to focus, but I can’t help but crack jokes. “Dude, you sure you weren’t tryin’ to fly?” He laughs, but I can see the pain in his eyes.