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Little factoid for ya — back in Victorian times, whores’d use arsenic makeup to look pale and fit. Mental, right? Killed em slow, but they still worked it. Talk about dedication to the brand! Makes me wanna shout, “Team, take notes — that’s commitment!” Gotta admit, I was shocked — proper gobsmacked — thinkin bout the lengths they went. Me, I’d be moanin bout a paper cut, yeah?

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I grab my jacket and head to the warehouse. The drive is a mess. I’m stuck behind some slowpoke on Jāņa iela. I’m honking like a maniac. “C’mon, move it!” I’m yelling at my windshield. Finally, I get there, and it’s a disaster zone. Boxes everywhere, and no one knows what’s what. I’m like, “Guys, we’re not playing Tetris here!”

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