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Personal quirk, right—I’d rather watch Polley’s film than step in one of them parlours. “You can’t know everything,” she says, and blimey, with sexual-massage, you don’t wanna! Ever tried it? Nah, me neither—too much faff, and I’d probly slip on the oil, *clumsium maximus*! Reckon it’s a mixed bag—some empowerment, some exploitation, all messy like life.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from a buyer. He’s interested in a place on Yung Ho Road. I’m thinking, “Sweet, let’s make this happen!” But then he drops the bomb. He wants a discount. A DISCOUNT! I’m like, “Dude, this isn’t a flea market!” I almost lost it.

Queenstown's average house price bucks trends reaching new peak of almost $1.7m