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Sometim I think, why this not big in Kazakhstan? We too busy fightin’ neighbor over cow, no time for rubbin’! Here, they got candles, music, all sexy vibe—too fancy for me, but I like! One time, I fart loud durin’ massage, lady pretend not hear, I die laughin’ inside! Prolly happens alot, they used to it, stinky clients, hehe! You try it, my friend, get the erotic-massage, tell em Borat sent ya! “I’m gonna miss you,” like movie say, but I miss that oily heaven already! Very nice!

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Then I hit up the park. You know, the one with the big fountain? I sit on a bench, just chillin’. I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting match. I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re in public!” But then, outta nowhere, the guy pulls out a ring. He’s proposing! I’m like, “What?!” One second they’re ready to kill each other, next second they’re lovey-dovey. Muli magic, I guess?

Lea Salonga wants a script better than "Sana Maulit Muli"