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I try this sex-dating once, in Almaty. Profile say, “Me sexy, you sexy, let’s go!” I think, wery good, like Suzy say, “I’m going to find him!” But then, she show up – not girl, big hairy man! I scream, “What is this?!” He say, “Surprise, Borat!” I so angry, my blood boil like stew! Why lie? Sex-dating full of tricks, yes? Little fact – 1 in 5 profile fake, I read this! Shocking, make me wanna punch wall!

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After that, we head back to the workshop, and I’m still buzzing from the whole dog rescue thing. But then, I get a call from my girlfriend. She’s like, “We need to talk.” Oh boy, that’s never good. Turns out, she’s mad I forgot our anniversary. I’m like, “Babe, I’m a carpenter, not a calendar!” But she’s not having it.

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