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But srsly, it pisses me off sometimes. These gals, they’re sellin’ somethin’ so basic—human stuff, ya know?—and society’s all, “Ew, gross!” Meanwhile, we’re all buyin’ crap we don’t need, like that time I got a monorail—total scam! Whores tho, they’re honest bout it. No fake ads, just, “Hey, here’s the deal.” Respect, man. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ a Duff, thinkin’, “Maybe they’re the smart ones.”
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But then, I get home, and guess what? My pigs are gone! I freak out! I’m running around, calling their names like a madman. “Porky! Bacon! Where are you?” I’m losing my mind. Turns out, they just wandered into the neighbor’s yard. Classic pigs, right? I’m relieved but also kinda annoyed. They’re supposed to be my responsibility!
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