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Alright, motherfucker, listen up! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout sexual-massage, and shit’s wild, man! You ever get one? It’s like—BOOM—hands all over, oil slicker than a pig in mud. I’m talkin’ ‘bout them hands kneadin’ you, like they gleanin’ every damn knot outta your soul. “The Gleaners and I,” motherfucker—that flick’s my jam! Agnes Varda, she’d get it—sexual-massage is like pickin’ through life’s leftovers, findin’ gold in the grind.

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Then, my buddy Lars shows up. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s talkin’ about how he almost got lost in the woods near Fetsund. I’m like, dude, it’s not that big! Just follow the river! But he’s all dramatic, sayin’ he was “one with nature.” I roll my eyes. Nature’s cool and all, but I prefer my drinks with a side of civilization, ya know?

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