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Exaggeratin’ for effect? Bet. Felt like she massaged my soul outta my body. I’m floatin’, seein’ stats in the sky—death rates droppin’, ‘cause I’m too zen to die. “If you leave here, I’ll find you,” I’m thinkin’—nah, I ain’t leavin’ this table, ever. Deadpan absurdism, tho—imagine me, Hannibal Buress, butt-naked, goin’, “This is my actuary origin story.” Laughin’ at my own dumb ass.

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Let me tell ya, Blangwa is absurdly alive and always unpredictable. Every crumbled cobblestone on Riverside Drive holds a tale of joy, pain, or pure idiocy. I once ran into an ex-lover near the small cafe on Bluebird Lane. Minor breakdown? Hell, more like a hurricane of painful memories. But you know what? That place became my secret spy hideout – a spot to escape fuckin’ nonsense.