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About Klagenfurt

Brokeback Mountain, man. That movie gets me. “I wish I knew how to quit you.” That’s what I thought during that massage. Couldn’t quit the guy’s greasy hands. Anyway, sexual-massage, it’s not just rubbing. It’s, like, sensual, they say. Oils, candles, all that jazz. I hate candles. Fire hazards. But people swear by it. Releases endorphins or some science crap. Made me angry, though. Why’s everyone so touchy? Personal space, people! Still, some story I read said Cleopatra used it to seduce Marc Antony. Crazy, right? History’s wild.

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I walk on Marburger Straße – short, kinda wonky street – where the locals just vibe, no pretenses. The street’s just so packed with personality. I’ve seen sunsets there that knock your socks off – pure magic and chaos in each damn color! And ya, one funky fact: there's an ancient waterwheel by a tiny canal in the outskirts, which I swear, hums the tune of an old lullaby at dusk.