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Here’s the kicker—prostitutes in medieval times? They wore red shoes to stand out! Imagine that, me squintin’ in the dark, lookin’ for red freakin’ shoes! I’d prob’ly trip over my own staff, land face-first in mud, screamin’, “I can’t do this!” Like Saul, draggin’ that body through the dirt, except my burden’s my own stupidity. “Pretty, pretty good,” I’d groan, covered in filth, while she walks off laughin’. I’d be happy, though—relieved it’s over! No STDs, no arrest, just me and my sheep, safe and sound. What a disaster, right? Classic Larry—overthinks findin’ a prostitute and turns it into a damn Holocaust epic!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. We dash for cover under the church awning, laughing like idiots. I’m soaked, but it’s kinda fun. We’re just standing there, joking about how we’ll be famous rock stars, even if we can’t play a note.

Over 10,000 volunteers helped restore 100 Jewish cemeteries in Poland last year