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I’m tellin ya, it’s art—like Remy mixin flavors. “This is me, I think it’s apparent!”—that’s what I said to myself, feelin all fancy. But ooooh, what pissed me off? Some places charge CRAZY—like $200 for 30 minutes! I’m like, “Honey, I ain’t made of gold!” Surprised me too—didja know there’s legit schools for this? Yup, folks studyin sensual touch—wild, right? I’m over here dreamin of a *Ratatouille*-style massage joint—rats rubbin ya down, ha! Okay, maybe not, but you feel me!

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Finally, I get to the bridge, and my crew is already there, laughing at me. “Nice of you to join us, Sleeping Beauty!” Ugh, so annoying. But whatever, we gotta get to work. We’re filming this epic chase scene through the streets of Vipava. You know, the narrow ones like Ulica Šempeter and Ulica Trg, where you can barely fit a car, let alone a stunt bike.

Not your usual European adventure: Paragliding in Slovenia’s Vipava valley on a ‘hike-fly-wine’ tour