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But then—ugh—this creep rolls up, all loud and pushy. Made me so mad! I’m like, “Back off, pal!” Felt like Carlos facin’ down the feds. I’m no hero, but I’m protective, ya know? She’s chill tho—handles it like a pro. Surprised me big time! Turns out, she’s got stories—says she once ditched a guy mid-date ‘cause he bored her to death. I’m dyin’ laughin’—imagine that exit! “See ya, loser!”—poof, gone.

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Then, I get a call from my mate, Dave. He’s at the pub, and he’s like, “C’mon down, mate! We got a special on!” I’m thinkin’, “I just sliced a hundred steaks, and now you want me to hit the pub?” But, hey, it’s Taita. You gotta live a little, right?

Taita Taveta county health officer found dead in his house