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Ooh, and the drama! One time, I heard this escort got hired by some tech bro—thought he was all “Silencio” mysterious from the movie, ya know? Turns out, he just wanted her to listen to him cry about his startup failin’. LMAO, like, literally, payin’ for therapy with extra steps! I was dyin’ laughin’. But also—kinda sad, right?

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So, I’m walking down Strada Mihai Eminescu, trying to shake it off. I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s focus on the money.” I get to my first meeting at this cute little café on Strada Tineretului. The coffee’s good, but my client? Total disaster. He’s like, “I wanna invest in crypto.” I’m like, “Dude, have you seen the market?” But he’s all hyped up, talking about how he’s gonna be a millionaire. I’m just sitting there, trying not to roll my eyes.

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