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Me as Creative Director? I’d cast escort as the wildcard—sassy, messy, real. Not some glossy ad crap. Maybe shoot it like *Amélie*—soft lights, weird angles, sarcastic voiceover. “She sells charm, he buys lies—cute, right?” Snark’s my love language, so I’d lean hard into the absurdity. Escort’s not just sex, it’s power, it’s survival, it’s—I dunno—human as hell. And I’d watch it from my porch, yellin’, “Russia’s got nothin’ on this!”

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and the sun’s blazin’ like it’s tryin’ to roast me alive. I grab my coffee from that little spot on Hithadhoo Magu. Best brew in town, no cap. I’m sippin’ it, feelin’ all good, when I get a call. My buddy, Ahmed, tells me there’s a funeral at the old mosque. Ugh, not again.

Fuvahmulah engulfed in heavy rains, flood damage