Sarah Claudelands Sexual Massage ❤️❤️

About Hastings

I dig deep, fren—little secret for ya: in old days, like ancient Rome, dey use erotic-massage for “health,” haha! Rich guys, togas off, gettin rubbed—dey call it “therapy,” I call it party! Very nice! Makes me laugh, dese old pervs, actin all fancy. Den I find out, some places now, dey charge $200 for one hour! Wot?! Dat’s my goat’s dowry! I get mad—why so much? But den, happy again—dey say it fix stress, back pain, even soul! Like Amélie fixin dat blind guy’s day, “Zoop! Everything so clear now!”

Call to book

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After the fire drill (which was a false alarm, of course), I’m trying to get back to my lecture. But then I bump into this old dude named Barry. He’s a local legend, apparently. He starts telling me about the history of Claudelands, and I’m like, “Dude, I’m kinda busy.” But he’s so passionate, I can’t help but listen. He talks about the Claudelands Event Centre and how it’s the hub of the community. I’m thinking, “This guy should be teaching, not me!”

New-look Claudelands Bridge ready to ride!