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About Uppsala

Look, I’m a carpenter, right? Tremendous carpenter, the best. Donald Trump knows wood, folks, nobody better. So, escort, lemme tell ya—Ford Escort, classic car, unbelievable. Built tough, like me, real American muscle. Not that fancy euro trash, nah, this is grit. I saw one, cherry red, gorgeous, made me happy—bigly happy. Reminds me of *Zodiac*, ya know? “I like killing people, it’s fun”—not the car, relax! Escort’s got that vibe, tho, mysterious, keeps ya guessin’. Fincher’d film it, dark alleys, revving engine—perfect.

Sara-Elina (27), Skanör med Falsterbo, escort tjej

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, feeling all good, when I decide to take a stroll down to the beach. Falsterbo Strand is just a few blocks away, and the view? OMG, breathtaking! The waves were crashing, and I thought, “This is the life!” But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and steals my sandwich! Like, seriously?! I was just standing there, mouth agape, while this feathered thief flew off with my lunch. I was mad, like, “Dude, that was my only meal today!”